Bothered

I felt really bothered and bad. The intense pressure imploding inwards. Is there no-one else I can whine and cry to? Feel like screaming. But I can't think of any avenue to do so. The morning's conversation started to stink in one way or another. But definitely stink. Am I over-sensitive to allow such to eat into me? I do not know.

Did I cut the conversation too abruptly? Or was I afraid of the possible distrust and unfair judgment that the other department practises. None-the-less, felt a heightened sense of fear. Adrenaline rush? Or simply mad? I don't know anymore. Have to think things through deeper.

Whatever I said carried certain responsibilities. Burden more likely. No longer can I just say what I think its ok. Have to think things through. Whine? Cut it out.

I just believe that there exist people who are out to malign people. To pepper stories and exaggerate the bads and leave out the truths. Now I truly understand Confucius' sayings about silence. The world would really be a great place to be in if people take the time to understand others first, rather than hear-say from others. Of Shakepearean sadness, Thy Tongue Kills Swifter than Thy Sword. I am very negative against such malicious talks. I don't like to participate in talks that judge people. Of course, I do judge. But it is after working and interacting with that person, then I judge. I am no saint. But to judge even before knowing who the person is? That is being unfair.

The only person I have done that recently, I admit, is to Edison Chan. I have condemned him.

Bothered.